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Thursday, April 29, 2010

To Caps Fans: I Apologize

Wow, are the next few days going to royally stink if you're into sucking up every word, every video, every second of media coverage.

Fingers are going to be pointed in every direction. Someone will call for McPhee's head, someone (or more than one someone) will call for Boudreau's head. Sidney Crosby is a winner, Alex Ovechkin is not. You'll hear that a lot. What do Alexander Semin and the Invisible Man have in common? Everything. They're the same guy.

Once I finish posting this, I'm going to ignore it all. I can't deal with it. My stomach hurts badly enough as it is and, besides, I know the real problem here.

Me. I jump hard on the bandwagon and this happens. For whatever reason, my teams have that little storm cloud of Joe Blpstk hanging over them.

I apologize to all of you. I assure you it won't happen again. I'm going to make like Michael Phelps and swim as far and as fast away from it as I can. I have enough crap to keep me awake at night, give me ulcers, make me mumble. I don't need anything else.

As a nod to the Kentucky Derby (the greatest single event in sports), I'll quote an unknown trainer's response when he was asked if he bet: "Bet? No way. These sumbitches have me talking to myself enough as it is."

Exactly. I'm out. But before I go - do not change the GM, do not change the coach. They've put together a team that is light years ahead of where it was a few short years ago. Now it is on them to rearrange some of the pieces and fix this so you remaining Caps fans don't have to deal with this nonsense anymore. Losing to the eighth seed is not like a 16 over a 1 in the NCAA tournament. It happens - didn't it happen to San Jose just last year? But you go up 3-1 on the eighth seed? You win that. Easy. In five.

Not the Caps. What they did was drain the life right out of me.

But, hey, HOW 'BOUT THOSE NATS! My Son The Braves Fan tried to cheer me up this a.m. by saying, "At least you root for a good baseball team." Seems his squad is up to eight straight and counting on the loss side. Normally, I might take pleasure in that.

Not today. Instead, I wonder if I ought to get out of the Nats business before I ruin them, too.

8 comments:

cass said...

Kentucky Derby? Really?

Not sure how to get into a sport featuring whipped slaves, bred so poorly that their bodies are prone to break so easily, raced too young before they are mature.

Thoroughbred racing is a vile and disgusting practice that should be outlawed. Sorry.

Jonathan said...

Cass, this is an oldie but goodie-PETA:People Eating Tasy Animals. The races are fantastic spectacles enjoyed by millions around the world. Get off your soapbox.

cass said...

Yup, that's a real goodie. A true rapier wit you have there. I'm sure it'll be masterful when you use it against an actual PETA-supporter.

I will simply note that the Roman gladitorial games were considered "fantastic spectacles" and enjoyed by quite the multitudes as well.

But I'll say no more, as I have stated my opinion and have no wish to continue a fight on a blog I otherwise enjoy.

Mike said...

Unfortunately Washington was not built for the playoffs and were easily schemed against. As RJ Umberger noted, they float the zone too much and spend too much time and effort looking for odd-man rushes and breakaways. Thats not how you win in the playoffs or get to/win the Cup.

George Templeton said...

That makes two of us, I do not want to hear 2 days of how flawed the Caps are and how Ovechkin isn't the winner Crosby is, etc. etc.

Sec 204 Row H Seat 7 said...

Don't quit the NATS Mike. You are the one that's made it all possible. I am a former CAPS season ticket holder (10 game plan in the '80s, lot of dissapointment, no playoffs--blown playoffs-one conference final). But I was a Senators (Rangers version--30 game plan) long before) so I will take on missed Cup (Revenge of Youpi) for a baseball team. GO NATS.

Nervous Nats Fan said...

I bet you loved this article. It made me like Livo even more. The part about him trying to wear the uniform home is so sweet.

WP Article

MikeHarris said...

I did dig that article.
Wonder if he'll have to prove his age to play on the Champions Tour? Wouldn't it be a hoot if he was out there in, oh, 8 years instead of 15?
I don't care how old the guy is, I love him.